Turtle

Okay, today has probably been the most wasted day of my life, ever. Woke up, went to class, went to tony's and slept until i had to go to PHS, took tony to pick up letters, came home, ate, slept, cleaned, and now this. I hate days like these. Now that i'm getting older, i like to constantly be out doing things. I can't wait to be out on my own doing my own thing. Once i start working again, i'm going to start buying stuff for my apartment so i don't get over whelmed in expenses. I am finally getting my senior pictures printed off tomorrow. I hope that tomorrow is more eventful than today was. I think i'm going bowling with tony, jasmin (his sister), and ryan (jasmin's bf). That should be fun. I wanna get dressed up and cute tomorrow. I'll probably just look like shit like always though. I've become a very lazy person when it comes to make up and dressing myself up. I'm going to try to change that tomorrow though =) Oh, i tried proactive today! Haha my face was like red and felt like i just got slaped in the face with a hot pan. It burned so bad. Hopefully this shit works cause my face is discusting. For real. Mmm, sooo everything and basically everyone annoyed me today. I've been having really bad nightmares so i wake up being already pissed off. Stupid girls make it even worse. And when my boyfriend never talks to me makes it a bajillion times worse. I think it's cause i don't get that much sleep so i get irratated very easy. Like the littlest things pisss me off. And i don't mean to be a bitch but when i'm mad, i'll defenatly let you know =) I feel better when i get this shit out though. Like now i'm in a good mood for some reason =)

Haha sooooo my new favorite thing to do is look at all the different pages on facebook that you can "become a fan" of. Seriously, they put me in such a good mood. I thought i was the only one who experienced some of that stuff. I think my favorite one is: "that test was so easyy!" *get the test back* "56% WHAT THE FUCK!" -- hahha uh that's my every day life. I suck at school. But there are so many groups on facebook that just crack me uppp. Andrea and I had a 10 minute phone conversation about them today and we just laughed the whole time. I'm kind of pathetic, i know.

So when i was "sleeping" on the couch today, i heard my little 8 year old brother begging my mom to have my room when i move out. It was pretty funny. Even he knows how bad i want to get the hell outta this house. I don't want to get out of my house because i hate my family or anything. i just feel that once i move out, i will experience so much more and live my life with out anyone telling me what to do. My parents sort of dictate the things i do. My curfew is still 12 which is bullshit, i barely ever go to parties, like i don't do shit. I want to go out and get dressed up every weekend =) Andd i HATE babysitting my brothers. I've been doing it since 5th grade, seriously. I have to sacrifice every Saturday to stay at home and watch them. It sucks that i am given the responsibilities of a mother, yet, i can't stay out past 12. I still have to call from a house phone so my parents make sure i am at that house. I'm getting to breaking point. I'm treated like a child when i've done nothing to be treated that way. I'm probably going to be one of those kids that goes crazy when they move out because they have been sheltered for so long. yup, thats going to be me. I'm obviously going to have to learn the hard way but whatever, that's life for yah.

Here are some good quotes I found today =) :

- There's a point in your life when you know who stays forever and who's just around for a while. People change, but so do you. Sometimes for the best and sometimes for the worst. Bad things happen, to everyone. you're not in it alone. People lie, and some people just don't care how you feel. Your heart beats, no matter how much pain you're in. Everything will be okay, eventually. Give it all you've got, and life you life to the fullest. People would kill to be you, have what you have. Someone always has it worst off than you, but that doesn't mean your pain doesn't count.
^^^(Quotes like those put me in a better moooood and really make me think about things. It's def 1000000% true!)

-I Can't help it baby, this is who i am. Sorry, but i can't just go turn off how i feel. you kill me, you build me up, but just to watch me break. I know what i should do, but I just can't walk away from you.

- Do you believe in forever? Cause i don't believe in tomorrow.

Okay, okay. I'm going to grab some food now and try to get to sleep cause i need to start sleeping better. I'm really starting to like this whole blog thing though. It puts me in a good mood cause i can get all the stuff out of my head =) oookay welll goodnightt!
ps- sorry for the light colors, I'm in a very spring moood today !